I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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