Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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