Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
