It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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