Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Randomize
