You kept calling me your small dog last night.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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