paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
You can't motorboat a personality
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
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