TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
I think a kid would responsible me up
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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