maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Alive.
So much puke
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
