and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
