He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
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