I want to stick my p in your. b.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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