Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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