I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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