i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize