doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
