You can't motorboat a personality
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Randomize
