Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Randomize