I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize