i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
