I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Randomize
