windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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