that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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