so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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