Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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