the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
