No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Randomize
