Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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