nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
