He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Randomize
