Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Congratulations! We have a period
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
