Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Randomize
