Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
