I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
