I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize