Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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