the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I love having hate sex.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
