I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Randomize
