well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
