Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
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