Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Randomize