My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
My breasts were aching with rage.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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