I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
This baby is an asshole
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Randomize
