talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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