that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
