i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
