Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize
