I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
