At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
