They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize